This will be a tough blog post for some of you to read, but as is often the case, so goes it with topics that strike a nerve.
Many folks who go through life with self-imposed limitations, often surround themselves with enablers. For example, someone who has a bad habit – likes to hang out with other folks with the same habit so that ____ (fill in the blank) is “normal.” There’s no pressure to correct yourself if those around you are engaged in the same lifestyle. Right? RIGHT!
The enabler in your life is your worst enemy.
It’s true.
The reason this is this case is because your enabler needs to keep you weak. An enabler is typically a weak person – someone who is a “delicate flower” (both male or female) that feels more secure when their spouse, partner, and friends are also weak. An enabler will typically come off as being strong – kind of like a security blanket. But in reality, what lies behind the enabler is a little daisy who needs the security of weakness.
Another sure sign of an enabler is a person who comes into your life to “save” you and be your “best friend,” but then ends up being a tyrant – eventually creating the circumstances in which you become something other than yourself.
People tend to fall back on certain things and/or
people in life who serve as enabling devices.
It’s comforting…and easy.
I am here to tell you that you will never move forward in life if you have an enabler and/or an enabling device by your side. Anything that is sending the message of “you’re fine the way you are” or “it’s okay…really, it’s okay,” is nothing other than your downfall.
I realize that I will be the only person
to tell you this, but it’s the truth.
You can’t change an enabler.
The enabler has to change itself.
Motivational speakers and self-help gurus don’t focus on the factors that really MAKE CHANGE happen. Instead, they fill you with helium and talk about you…and “just doing it.” They high-five you, or maybe even give you a “fist pound” (the alternate to a handshake). The speakers go home with oodles of money, and you go home with a bag of helium that eventually deflates down into nothing.
As you might expect, I don’t have a lot of close friends who are motivational speakers. Even if you like what they have to say, I KNOW that what they are often telling you is UNREALISTIC. It’s true.
They don’t tell you the truth.
They only tell you what you want to hear…which is why you enjoy what they have to say. I tell people the truth, which is why people walk out of the first day of my headspace-oriented talks feeling beat-up. The same will take place in a few weeks at my HEADSPACE SEMINAR in Las Vegas.
If you have an enabler in your life, then you can immediately snip 50% off your potential. The only two people who will argue that point will be your enabler, and of course, YOU.
Have A GREAT Day!
…Dr. Marc